I'm not usually a proponent of funnyordie.com, but this is pretty spot-on. Plus, I like that it really twists the dagger with the imagery behind the women. Watch and I will discuss more.
First of all, I love Kate Beckensale with her faux-suit on (probably heels and Express slacks, wait, no, she'd definitely be wearing designer name-brand), her sensible brown hair, and her SUV, all posing in front of her undoubtedly suburban mansion.
Secondly, "I don't want government in my banks..." "I don't want government in my classrooms," are both well-said. Republicans DON'T want the government getting involved with the handling of their taxes (or tax breaks), their loans, or the handling of their children's education (as everyone knows the state can be trusted to tell teachers what they should and shouldn't teach -- i.e., the antiquated, Western WASP agenda), nor do they want the government dispersing the taxes from their wealthy zip codes to the districts of the less fortunate children of America. No, "I want the government way, way deep, up, up there in my vagina." And I love the gasp of fresh air immediately preceding the proud declaration: "In my great-grandmother's vagina."
Thirdly -- "What about my right to choose to not have a choice," is, unfortunately, the stance I feel so many females taking these days, especially conservative women who don't want to rock the boat in their relationship, their friendships, or the eyes of their colleagues and peers. I even hear high school-aged girls making statements that suggest they are proponents of "choosing to not have a choice." Why not let the old, white guys decide for us? Or our non-female spouses? Or, in the case of my high school students, the uneducated, poverty-stricken, not-yet-through-puberty-but-certainly-fertile-and-unwilling-to-wear-a-condom boyfriends choose? Why do (some) women so adamantly shirk the right to make our OWN choices?
Fourthly, though I don't really appreciate the lines about vaginas being "gushy... secret[ing] things... [or] looking like unshaven clown[s]," I know that some women feel that way. And some women honestly haven't ever "really looked at it." To those women, I'd strongly suggest immediately purchasing and reading The Vagina Monologues, if, at which point you become as hooked to Eve Ensler as I am, I suggest A Memory, A Monologue, A Rant and A Prayer as an immediate follow-up. Vaginas are not gross, gushy, scary, or unrelenting. They are delicate, intricate, delicious, individual, and complex. Check yours or your loved-ones out today!
Fifthly, I like that Judy Greer and Kate Beckinsale address the real issues at stake for women who choose to vote Republican on certain issues: restrictions on affordable birth control, futile vaginal ultrasounds, unwanted pregnancies, but I wish they weren't addressed so tongue-in-cheekedly; these are real issues, and while I agree that sometimes humor is the only way to recruit people to your side, I think women really need to know about these issues. I wish there was a link to a more informative website which compares democrats and republicans' views on women's rights (ie - Obama vs. Romney).
Finally - this quote at the end; whoa! Where did that come from? "The traumatic experience of rape causes a woman to 'secrete a certain secretion that tends to kill sperm.'" Really, Stephen Freind? Did you really say that?
So, yes, in closing -- Women -- defend your "oval office!" Don't let the government in! Vote Democratic!
(If this blog enraged you - I'm sorry. Please calm down by viewing a couple calming manatees on my new favorite tranquil site.)
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